


Rescuing Me

by symbolcrash



Category: Harry Potter - Fandom
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-12-12
Updated: 2004-12-12
Packaged: 2017-11-14 05:33:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/511866
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/symbolcrash/pseuds/symbolcrash
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Remus moves into his new flat. The others congratulate him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Rescuing Me

**Author's Note:**

  * For [harmonicalesson](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=harmonicalesson).



> Is like a good-looking, intelligent nudist. Always welcome. Concrit, reviews, flames, go for it. My fic and I are at your mercy. Or lack thereof.

I stood in the middle of the room. It was almost too good to be true -- I pinched my arm repeatedly to make sure that this entire week hadn't been a prodigiously elaborate hallucination -- but I still stood there, real as the room itself, grinning and gaping like a fool.   
  
Or so Sirius told me.  
  
"Moony, stop grinning and gaping like a fool," he joked, though his deprecation of my slack jaw went through one ear and out the other, so the saying goes. I'd grin and gape if I wanted -- it was my flat.  
  
 _My flat._  
  
"Look," said Peter. "Fully furnished, even -- "  
  
"That would be Mum's doing," I said quietly, running my fingers along the arm of the old comfortable chair that used to be in my father's den. I wondered, with some amusement, how many "discussions" it had taken for my mother to convince my father that the chair would do well in the flat rather than collecting dust by the bookcase.  
  
James flopped down on the couch. The springs gave a small creak of protest. "Oh," James murmured, shooting me a sly look. I squinted. He bounced on the springs again. "Oh, this is splendid." Creak, creak. "Look, mates," he grinned, "now we'll be able to tell from cities away if Moony ever acquires a sex life."  
  
I slapped my hand against my forehead. "Honestly."  
  
Sirius and Peter snickered. "Don't be ridiculous," Sirius admonished. "We know all it'll take is a particularly dishy librarian, and your heart'll be gone forever." He fluttered his eyelashes.   
  
I shook my head. "I owl you all about my new flat, and this is the congratulations I receive."   
  
"Don't pout, Moony; it's disturbing," James said. "Besides, what makes you think we  _haven't_  thought about a congratulatory something for our dearest friend?" He waggled his eyebrows. "Hm?  _Hmm?_ "  
  
Oh, hell's bells. I knew that look. "The meager and futile hope that my worst fears won't be realised?" I offered.  
  
"Wrong!" Peter interjected gleefully.  
  
Sirius clapped a hand on my shoulder and leaned in as if he were going to divulge some secret. I blinked and regarded him with slight unease. "Yes?" I asked, inching away with the subtly communicated yet unmistakable intent of escape.  
  
He smirked. "You don't do much these days, do you?"  
  
"You should know that," I replied cautiously. I didn't mind mundanities at all. In fact, there was little I enjoyed more than lounging on a comfortable couch with tea and a good book in hand. James, Sirius, and Peter had long since deemed that particular vice unacceptable and in need of immediate remedy. More often than not, I humoured them. "Not unless you three attempt to 'rescue' me from my perfectly enjoyable 'pit of mediocrity,'" I retorted.  
  
"Hah!" Sirius scoffed. "Listen to him! He's gone barmy, this one."  
  
James chuckled. "Moony's always been a few beans short of a pod." Peter snorted a laugh into his hand.  
  
"Very funny," I deadpanned. "So, if I may be so bold to inquire, what's this 'congratulatory something'?"  
  
"I'll give you a hint," Peter said. I raised my eyebrows expectantly, after which he cupped a single hand to the side of his mouth and whispered, rather loudly: "It's a surprise."  
  
Thank you, Peter.  
  
James stood from the couch, a ne'er-do-well grin plastered on his face as he clapped his hand on my other shoulder.  
  
Trapped. Damn it all. "I don't like your look," I said, shrinking back.  
  
"What look?" said James innocently. I pointed him in the direction of the decorative mirror by the window, but he didn't budge. "Lupin, all we want to do is take you out into town so you can abandon all thought processes for a night in favour of good, old-fashioned  _fun._ " He let go of my shoulder. "I know what you're on about, and for the last time -- "  
  
"I'm not on about anything," I defended.  
  
"Well, then? What's the problem?" He eyed me with a good deal of scrutiny, and I was privately dejected when I found I didn't have an answer for him. "Really, there is nothing wrong with going out and getting properly pissed."   
  
I opened my mouth to protest, but James interrupted me before I could continue. " _Especially_  if you're a tutor. Believe me, I'm sure no one enjoys the effects of alcohol more than parents and teachers."  
  
"I don't think the majority of this pub's patron's are literate, anyhow," Sirius commented.  
  
Peter nodded. "They couldn't write complaints to anyone."  
  
"Couldn't write to save their lives," said James.  
  
"Because people who are trying to kill you very rarely ask you to write something to appease them," I replied.  
  
James snorted. "What we're trying to  _tell_  you is that people are not likely to raise a protest if they see you in a pub."  
  
"Unless you're swinging upside-down and starkers from a support beam," Peter added.  
  
Sirius shrugged. "Some lovely bird might even enjoy the show."  
  
I couldn't duplicate the look I gave him then if I tried. "But -- I'm not overly fond of nudity," I protested. He glanced at me with an expression that spelled nothing but doubt about my gender. "In social situations," I mumbled.  
  
"So, we'll get you sloshed and you can come back to your nice, new flat -- and  _then_  hang starkers off a support beam."  
  
"There aren't any."  
  
"Light fixtures, then. Whatever floats yours."  
  
"Sirius," I began slowly, "I'm afraid of you."  
  
"Good," he remarked, punctuating it with a firm nod. "Prongs?"  
  
James came up and grabbed my arm. "What -- " I sputtered, but it was to no avail.   
  
Sirius gestured toward the other end of the room. "Wormtail?" Peter grabbed my other arm with similar force. Then, Sirius opened the door.   
  
"You've got to be kidding me," I groaned.  
  
"Not quite!"   
  
"Augh!" I felt my feet being pulled out from beneath me, and suddenly I was half-horizontal, half-sitting, my body twisted a bit sideways when I tried to flail out of their grasp. "A simple 'Let's go, then' would've worked, you know!" I remarked, exasperated.  
  
James laughed. "Ah, Moony." He shook his head with a fond, mock-condescending smile. "Moony, Moony, Moony. You never learn, do you."  
  
I sighed, resigned to my fate. "Where's the fun in that?"


End file.
